Sometimes, under the gauze and yellow salves, under the allografts patching your body like so many potato and corn fields planting God’s earth, I glimpse you, the real you, my twinned soul from before, the brother who rode me on handle-bars, who beat up the bully on the bus, who read me to sleep when we were kids, the way I read to you now, and that’s when I grip your hand, the good one, glad the explosion incinerated the poison inside even if it burned off your smile, because now you are yourself, pure, saved, clean these 17 days. Inspired by the
52-250 Flash a Year Challenge theme: under wraps. Plus, I was wondering what happened to
MARTY.
And, I'm honored to have garnered an honorable mention for SHUT-EYE in
FLASH FICTION CHRONICLE's STRING-OF-TEN CONTEST, run by the superlative
Gay Degani and guest-judged by
Michelle Reale. Yay!
Peace...
Posts
What a twisted take on the prompt. I loved it. This one definitely leaves the reader wanting to know more.
ReplyDeleteoh my!
ReplyDeleteLinda, if I said well done would you consider it a bad pun?
okay I won't say it, but you know I thought it
Makes me wonder - was he the one who created the explosion to vent hate or was he the recipient...
ReplyDeleteThe literary twilight zone. Nice.
ReplyDeleteI literally gasped at he end. Wow. You pack so much into so few words.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on your honorable mention.
What a one to read back-to-back with Peggy's. Similarly breathless, though much faster and concentrated in its intensity.
ReplyDeleteClean and precise, as always. And moving, as always. I don't know how you do it.
ReplyDeleteCongrats on your honerable mention.
you sent me to the dictionary..again with allografts! I am always entertained AND educated by your writes..
ReplyDeleteLike Peg, I gasped at the end.
ReplyDeleteAddiction steals so much from us that I can see how this horrible accident would seem like manna from heaven. Her remembering riding on the handlebars made my throat catch.
Some day I think you should write something really, really bad - just so we can mark it on our calendars as a sign of the apocalypse.
Cathy had warned me about this story, and you didn't disappoint! Wonderful.
ReplyDeleteQuite a picture you paint here and in so few words. But that's a tough way to get cleaned up, It worked, at least for 17 days. Hope his brother can stay clean once the wraps come off.
ReplyDelete~jon
That last little bit is definitely a punch to the gut. What a way to find the silver lining in an explosion (a meth lab explosion?) that destroyed just about every other thing left of the twin.
ReplyDeleteI am constantly amazed at how much can be suggested by so few words. You have crafted something so strong here. It hurts, but is touching and feels real too.
ReplyDeleteSounds like whatever happened to this guy was bad news. Interesting his sister does not feel empathy for his condition, her main focus in this piece is her own need to see him as he was. I had to read this a couple of times. I like it, but something about it disturbs me-haunts me.
ReplyDeleteSounds like whatever happened to this guy was bad news. Interesting his sister does not feel empathy for his condition, her main focus in this piece is her own need to see him as he was. I had to read this a couple of times. I like it, but something about it disturbs me-haunts me.
ReplyDelete