Friday, September 18, 2009

#fridayflash: Lifeguard Off Duty

Sun-kissed curls bouncing, the child patters through sea-foam. A shell glistens. Water surges, a wall of green and white. Sand shifts beneath her toes.


My small contribution to #fridayflash.

Peace, Linda

18 comments:

  1. Last story I read before I go and rest my poor little eyes. Your soothing, lyrical piece made them very happy!

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  2. What a breath of fresh sea air. Thank you for this, Linda.
    Lyrical and crisp as ever.

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  3. I love how your quiet lyrics hide a tragic undertow...a feat I've seen you pull off in other works. Beautiful.

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  4. Very nice. You could classify this wonderful piece as hint fiction. Very nice indeed.

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  5. Thanks guys. Laura, undertow indeed; an earlier title was Riptide. Chris, thank you for dropping by. This is indeed hint fiction, one of several I was playing with but missed Robert Swartwood's deadline due to a family emergency. So here is one for public consumption... Peace, Linda

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  6. I felt a sense of foreboding on reading this. Don't keep me in suspense. Either turn it into a short story or write a sequel.

    Jai

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  7. This is lovely! There's a certain feeling of peace that is fully encompassed in your words. So calming... I feel like I'm being rocked to sleep by the sea's waves.

    Great job!

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  8. Ack! I was a lifeguard and my kids have curly hair and I'm secretly scared of the ocean and and ... Beautiful piece, stirred up small whirlpool of reactions in me.

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  9. Yikes. I was rereading it again, smiling at the image then I noticed the title and my heart jumped. Very subtle way to lull your reader and then stop their heart...lol. I've never heard of hint fiction, I like it!

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  10. I like the way the title itself is sort of part of the prose, rather than merely acting as a description

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  11. Wow. Ominous and beautiful at the same time.

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  12. Nice combination of the body of the story and the title. And the contrast of the two adds punch to the story.

    - KjM (Open ID seems to be having a problem - I'm not really hexadecimal, I think)

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  13. Well done, Linda. Shows just how important a part the title is to a piece of fiction. Two completely different stories here, with and without the title. That's sharp.
    ~jon

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  14. Thank you all for reading my first fridayflash. I'm stil lmaking the rounds reading them all - fabulous writers here.

    Hint fiction is, by definition, 25 words or shorter, not including the title. Which is why the title is so important. Furthermore, hint fiction is not a complete story so much as allusion to something or someone that makes you go... hmmmm. More than a pretty vignette, and less than a complete story. A real challenge to write, but very satisfying. Hope you enjoyed reading as much as I enjoyed penning. Peace, Linda

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  15. This is my favourite type of fiction, short, crisp and efficient. Every word counts. You do this beautifully. This one grabbed me when I first read it on Friday and has not yet let me go.

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  16. Thanks Laurita. I remember your EU flash fiction piece and, truth be told, this one reminded me of yours. Calamity at ocean's edge... thank you. Peace, Linda

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  17. Finally stopped by your #fridayflash post, Linda. Sorry I arrived so late. This piece strikes a horrifying note in such a short time. Well done and welcome to the party.

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